Colin Cowherd Compares Classic Thanksgiving Foods to NFL Quarterbacks


Colin Cowherd: “Thanksgiving and football go together, so I thought I would combine the two. I’m going to compare Thanksgiving food to NFL quarterbacks.”

TURKEY: “Tom Brady is of course, turkey. The staple of any holiday meal. A little dry, some people say it’s kind of a system food, Tom is in bed by 9 pm, and Turkey puts you to sleep by 8:30.”

HAM: “Patrick Mahomes is ham. Better than turkey, but not as historic. Still on the rise, you can do a lot with ham. You can do a lot more with ham than with turkey. If you got ham in the house, you’re never out of contention for a great dinner, you can do something with it.”

MASHED POTATOES: “Big Ben is mashed potatoes. A little boring and you kind of know what you’re going to get. Right behind turkey as the staple. It was once a nice and sturdy potato, but has been mashed over time.”

GRAVY: “Russell Wilson is gravy. Kind of makes everything better, but if you’re forced too much gravy, it can lead to kind of a mess, but it also covers up something that doesn’t turn out right.”

SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE: “Aaron Rodgers is sweet potato casserole. Flashiest dish on the table, a little arrogant because it knows how good it is, and initial impressions can turn people away, but when done right it’s the best thing on the table.”

CRANBERRY SAUCE: “Baker Mayfield is cranberry sauce. Some people love it, some people hate it, and it’s not really a meal on its own. Drafted too high, and you ask yourself, ‘do we really need it?’

STUFFING: “Taysom Hill is stuffing. Kind of a mix of everything. Rarely seen the rest of the year, and not really sure what is it. Different ways to use it, and I’m not really sure it’s a starter.”

PECAN PIE: “Kyler Murray is pecan pie. It shouldn’t work but it does. I’m not sure you choose it, but when you do, you always know you made the right choice. Not as traditional as pumpkin pie. He switched sports, and this used to just be a nut, and now it’s a dessert. Very versatile!”

ROLLS: “Derek Carr is rolls. Very strong staple. Overlooked. It doesn’t take that long to prepare, but it’s overlooked. It always rises with the right catalyst, kind of limited, not flashy, but with the right chef, Gruden, can make it really good.”

THE CENTERPIECE: “Jimmy G is the centerpiece. Looks good, everybody stares at it, very expensive, not sure if it’s your long-term future, very fragile, and if you spend too much on it, you can really be questioning your decision and your judgement.”

Check out the hilarious full video above.

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